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Sophia's Children

Living and Leading the Transformation.

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Conscious Communication

Dealing With Sanctimonious A**es (And What We Can Learn From Them)

Yes, I do mean what you think I mean by "sanctimonious a**es." It made sense to get right to it, rather than hedge with more gentle, round-about language, since I noticed a theme arising. 'Tis the season, in line with... Continue Reading →

It’s Time For Uncommon Skills and Islands of Sanity. Again.

"I know it is possible to create islands of sanity in the midst of disruptive seas. … And I have studied enough history to know that such leaders always arise when they are most needed. Now it’s our turn." ~... Continue Reading →

A Less-Mentioned (but Huge) “Ism.”

Jeff Japp, in his Stuff Jeff Reads blog, muses about another of the super-insidious yet not as often mentioned "isms" ingrained and "toxic-normalized" into our culture, alongside racism and sexism/misogyny, linking what we see now with what Shakespeare wrote about in... Continue Reading →

How Can HeArtful Inquiry Be a Powerful Practice? (The Question Holds the Lantern)

Mindful inquiry. Sacred inquiry. Transformative inquiry. Affirmative inquiry. All of these point to a particular way of working with questions that's a little different from the same old, same old. This was one of the topics (or themes, or skill... Continue Reading →

Fault Vs. Responsibility – Insights from Will Smith

Here's an insight from Will Smith about how essential it is that we switch from a default mode of fault and blame to responsibility. Things like this add up to greater empowerment, agency, and a more skillful ability to relate... Continue Reading →

Savor the Moment, Deepen Intimacy

“You see, there is a tendency to talk about the moment, more than to savor the moment.” ~ Debra K. Fileta, The Effect of Social Media on Relationships, Relevant Magazine It's not just about technology, of course; "Smart Phones" and... Continue Reading →

Indie-Spirit FYIs, Nuggets + Recommended Reads

Wild times, eh? And it's Independence Day (or week, or year?) here in the U.S. In such a large (just shy of 322-million people) and very diverse population as we have in many parts of the U.S., 'holidays' like this... Continue Reading →

The Evidence We Gather (and the Gifts of Appreciation & Gratitude)

Something that a mentor once said to me, years ago now, really stayed with me. He said: "Isn't it amazing how we humans find it so much easier to gather 'evidence for suffering' than we do to 'gather evidence for... Continue Reading →

From Feeling Invisible and Unheard, to Deeply Seeing and Listening

“Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around.” ~ Leo Buscaglia... Continue Reading →

Just Mercy and Compassionate Communication: An Elegant Message from Bryan Stevenson

"... if you're a teacher your words can be meaningful, but if you're a compassionate teacher, they can be especially meaningful. If you're a doctor you can do some good things, but if you're a caring doctor you can do... Continue Reading →

The Harm of Overheated Talk

“I’ve been on a soapbox for months now about the harm that our overheated talk is doing to us. Yes it mobilizes supporters—but by mobilizing them with hysterical accusations and pseudo-information, overheated talk has made it impossible for representatives to... Continue Reading →

Oh Those NarciPaths – Shahida’s “20 Narci Tactics”

I'd usually just reblog this one, but the reblog format is funky. So I'm just going to say this: Shahida Arabi, via her Self-Care Haven blog, recently posted an excellent summary of 20 often-used Bully and NarciPath tactics. I shared... Continue Reading →

Relationship Alchemy vs. Dreary Bickering

"The possibilities that exist between two people, or among a group of people, are a kind of alchemy. They are the most interesting thing in life." ... "When relationships are determined by manipulation, by the need for control, they may... Continue Reading →

Listening, Empathy and Shouted-Down Doubt

" ... it’s just a clear example of people not listening. They are just not listening. I want to say, “Read my lips. This is how I feel, and it is my experience. And it is my own, and it’s... Continue Reading →

The Beauty Way of Relating

Are you feeling an growing call towards greater harmony, beauty, and social artistry? Or are you noticing, or even mired in, their opposites -- disharmony, conflict, relational dysfunction -- which are seemingly over-abundant in the world right about now? I'll... Continue Reading →

The Power of Inquiry: Loving the Questions Themselves

I'm always amazed at the seeming magic of replacing a period with a question mark. Know what I mean? If you've explored the power of inquiry -- the art of asking the good questions -- you've likely found, as I... Continue Reading →

Placebo Nocebo: Prediction and Word-Power

"Time-based prophecies that kept me from living, in the moment I am struggling to trust the divinity ... " ~ Nahko Bear This is a wee bit of a rant, though mild as possible rant-ampage can go. In recent weeks,... Continue Reading →

Angry People. Stay calm and keep on walking.

This is a good reminder from Laurie Rohner, since the Energies of Now may well stir up the ol' Hissy Fits and Tantrum Yoga outbursts, and the drama-drama-conflama moments. Full moon, lots of zap-zone energetics buzzing around, and the ups-and-downs... Continue Reading →

Reclaiming Your Power from Unconstructive Criticism

When I saw this article from Rick Hanson, it took all of a nanosecond for me to recognize the pattern he's talking about. It's one that can make me wince just thinking about it, though it's common enough. In the... Continue Reading →

The Ways Narcissists Get Inside Your Head – from Self-Care Haven

I linked to Shahida Arabi's excellent "Five Powerful Ways Abusive Narcissists Get Inside Your Head" in my Sophia's Children post on "When Withholding is a Toxic Tactic" (part of the ongoing Resources for Empaths & Sensitives Series). But it's so... Continue Reading →

Empaths+Sensitives Series: When ‘Withholding’ is a Toxic Tactic

That's right. Withholding as a toxic-normal interpersonal tactic. The proverbial simmering silent treatment or cold shoulder that leaves us (or others) wondering what the heck happened, what we did wrong (even if we didn't actually do anything wrong and sort... Continue Reading →

Venus and Iris – the Shamanic Diplomat

Our Venusian selves have just gone Mercurial. Are you sensitive and attuned enough to feel it yet? If not, you'll be able to if you wish. Read on for tips, so you'll be able to create more skillfully with this energy in... Continue Reading →

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